|
|
|
|
"TRAIN UP A CHILD..."
VIII. REINFORCING BEHAVIOR (Eph. 6:4 ; Tit. 2:3)
- While each child is a unique individual, he learns behavior patterns in the
home from his parents. Parents reinforce information they give to their children by a balance of discipline and
rewards. Sometimes, perhaps without being conscious of what they are doing, they actually reinforce the very behavior
that is most detrimental to the family and the child's well being.
- The desire of every parent should be to rear a wise son whose behavior is respectful,
courteous, and truthful. Is that what your children are like?
- If your children are habitually selfish and defiant, then you may be reinforcing that
behavior by the way you are dealing with them. Something needs to change.
- Rewarding good behavior is essential to good conduct. That may be done by kind words, approval, praise and
sometimes physical rewards. Children will not be trained properly who know only the rod of correction. Behavior
is reinforced by rewards for doing good and by discipline for acting badly.
QUESTIONS
- If you determine that some kind of behavior is harmful enough to spank your child for doing it, then you must
be determined that every time that act is committed that you will deal with it in the same way! To do otherwise
is to confuse and frustrate the child. How important is consistency in instruction and discipline? For instance,
in a circumstance where a parent disciplines a child for not picking up his toys one day but lets it slide the
next day, what kind of behavior is the parent really reinforcing?
- If a child knows that a parent threatens discipline but rarely carries through with it, what do you think the
child will do?
- Communicating values through patient, daily instruction is essential. Right and wrong behavior must be imparted
over and over again and the child should be impressed with God directed truth. Children need to hear the Bible
read and to hear their parents pray for them (note Deut. 6:6-9). In this way, parents are constantly reinforcing
truth directed behavior. What will a child be like who does not know God's truth? Are your children getting what
they need?
- From a practical point of view, when a child throws a tantrum fit because he does not get his way, and the
parent offers him a reward if he will quit, the parent is actually reinforcing behavior that is bad. The child
has learned that by being bad, he will get a reward. How do you think the child will act under all similar circumstances?
- Rewarding good behavior is essential to good conduct. That may be done by kind words of love which show approval,
by praise for a job well done, or by physical rewards. Children cannot be trained properly who know only the rod
of reproof and correction. Behavior is reinforced by rewards for doing good and by discipline for acting badly.
How balanced are you as a parent in both rewarding and disciplining?
[Outline] [Purpose] [Recommended Reading] [Introduction] [Lesson
I] [Lesson II] [Lesson III] [Lesson IV] [Lesson V] [Lesson VI] [Lesson VII] [Lesson VIII] [Lesson IX]
|
