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 Nothing,
we are told, has more influence on what we become in later life
than what we learn in our earliest years. And, no one, as we
know, plays a more important role in these early and formative
years of development than the mother. While it is true that she
has no control over the sex or physical attributes of her
offspring, the mother, more than any one else, is in a position
to mold their disposition and character. What an unparalleled
opportunity and responsibility, this business of training up
children in the way they should go! (Prov. 22:6)
Accordingly,
among the very first things every young mother should learn is
this "way they should go". It is God's way; it is
bringing them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Eph.
6:4). One of the biggest mistakes made by many young mothers in
child rearing is in seeking the counsel of the ungodly —those
who have no regard for the counsel of God (Ps. 1:1). Only too
late have some realized their mistake in following the advice of
prominent psychologists who encouraged
"self-expression" and permissiveness in children.
Regretfully, even Christians sometimes forget that God's way is
always best. No better handbook on child rearing can be found
than the Bible — and the best mothers will be those who learn
and apply its teachings to their children and to themselves.
Consequently,
the mother must live in accord with the way her child should go.
Example is one of her most effective teaching tools. As a
proverb mentioned in Ezekiel says, "As is the mother, so is
her daughter" (16:44). There are no pretentious
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airs at home. What we are there IS what
we are and even small children know it. What God is to a mother
cannot be hidden from her child — and it constitutes the
strongest kind of a recommendation for a similar faith. Much
good teaching can be nullified by the influence of a bad
example. As some sage has noted, to teach right and live wrong
is like feeding our children good food with one hand and poison
with the other. The mother who doubts the lasting influence of
her example need only to recall what she remembers about her
mother from childhood — and so shall she be remembered!
It
is mostly the mother who puts across the tremendously important
and needful lessons concerning respect and responsibility.
Regard for authority MUST begin at home! — and it cannot be
taught too early. Proper attitudes are taught, not inherited.
If, in the first four or five years of life, a child does not
learn that he is responsible for his actions and that he cannot
defy authority, look out for the next fifteen years or so! The
mother who indulges a defiant and rebellious child invites
misery and heartaches. God says that true love will not spare
the rod (Prov. 13:24). As a noted Los Angeles doctor has said,
"The greatest social disaster of this century is the belief
that abundant love makes discipline unnecessary". How
deceived many have been!
And
how deceived are mothers who say they can't afford to take the
time for such training. They can't afford not to!
Dan S. Shipley
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