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 This
story came right out of the heart of my native Kentucky, and I
may have scooped Joe Creason with it.
A
well known preacher of the past generation was hurriedly called
to preach the funeral of one of two brothers. He had known the
two men well in past years; and knew John to be an irresponsible
sinful man, the very antithesis of his brother Ned. John was the
town drunkard; Ned was an elder in the church, patiently doing
what he could to care for John’s neglected family, and uphold
the family name. The preacher felt that the contrast of the two
lives was so well understood, even by the family, that any
attempt to gloss John’s sinful life with funeral oratory would
be inexcusable hypocrisy, so he chose a direct and factual
course.
“Now
we all know the kind of man John was, and our sympathy for his
family can not change the truth. He cheated many of you in
business, and drank up or gambled away the money that should
have gone to his family. He was selfish, ugly-tempered, and a
terrible ——” The preacher paused as he noticed a man in
the audience wave his hand in a “shhhh” signal, and shake
his head negatively. But the preacher was determined
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to persist
in the course he had started.
He
continued, “John had no time to serve the Lord. He made no
preparations for death or judgement ———” By now the man
in the audience was waving frantically, so he stopped and
addressed the objector: “Well Sir, if you have something good
to say for the deceased John, say on.”
“I
have nothing good to say for John,” the man replied. “But
John ain’t deceased. He’s sitting over there with the
family, and the man in the coffin is Ned.”
If
my informant is correct, the preacher kept his cool, and turning
to the family said, “I’m very sorry about this; but John,
you should realize that this is the way an honest preacher would
have to preach your funeral, unless you change your ways.”
It
makes a better story to stop two paragraphs back; but here I am,
wondering what happened to John. You see, I take these Kentucky
stories seriously. I’m also wondering if that preacher was
ever invited to preach another funeral in that section.
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